Things You Should Not Say To Someone Suffering From Depression

Supporting someone suffering from depression can be difficult. Sometimes it is tempting to distance yourself from this person. Instead of risking saying or doing something that could aggravate the situation.

The worst thing you can do, however, is distance yourself: Your friend or relative who is living with this disorder needs your help more than ever before.

However, keep in mind that some of the most well-meaning phrases may have a different meaning for someone suffering from depression. The last thing a person in such a situation needs is to  feel their emotional state is misunderstood. 

Things to never say to someone with depression:

“Why can’t you just be happy?”

Depression can give a distorted view of life.  It is impossible just to be happy. Pressing them to put a smile on their face can give them an increased sense of guilt. It can also make them feel even more hopeless because they cannot feel joy like “normal” people.

There is no quick fix to cure a depression and insisting on or expecting a sudden change can reinforce feelings of discouragement and failure.

“There are pills and therapy for people with depression”

Some people are afraid to ask for help because of the stigma often associated with mental illness. They may not want to show how they feel as we live in a culture where only productive and happy people are valued.

Medication can be a major cause of stress due to prejudiced perceptions and beliefs surrounding the addiction or side effects. When it comes to medication, people with depression may be afraid of the consequences of their choices.

It is okay to mention the possibility of seeking out therapy, but let them choose for themselves what suits them best . 

“Just focus on getting through it”

People who are not depressed do not experience a decrease in their physiological or psychological energies, but these symptoms are very common in patients who have a depression.

You may have the best of intentions when you tell someone who is depressed. They just need to get up and start doing something that will make them feel better, like going out on the town or traveling or trying to have a little fun.

While understandable, it can actually aggravate their state of despair. No one wants to overcome these feelings more than themselves, but they do not know how. 

Their moods, thoughts and behaviors are out of their control.

“It’s not that bad. Other people go through much worse things ”

No one wants to be compared to starving children living in war zones or people living with a life-threatening illness. Why would you force a depressed person to think about it? Do you really think it will make them feel better?

People who suffer from depression already have lots of negative thoughts that they cannot control. When someone insists on using them as an example of the lives of others, they will most often get much worse. 

Even if you mean well, you will not achieve anything by saying this to them.

“You want to feel better tomorrow”

This disease is not a type that disappears overnight. When you say something like that, it will only further discourage a person with depression. Only people who have experienced depression up close will really be able to understand how deep the pain, suffering and hopelessness can be.

With the right medical approach, it is possible to overcome depression,  but it takes time. Saying something like this will make them feel even more uncomfortable and misunderstood.

“You are to blame for it”

People judge others all the time, which can be a serious mistake when you trust your own personal values, lack of information or ignorance about the subject in general.

Some people think that bad mood is self-inflicted: If you feel so bad, then maybe it’s because you’re just a negative person who constantly complains about everything.

But that, of course, is not at all what depression is all about.

This setting has dramatic negative consequences, which only aggravates the condition of the person suffering from depression.

“Do not be so negative”

It’s hard to be around someone with depression. Their low energy level and gloomy mood can make you depressed and many people instinctively deviate from these individuals. Sometimes these people reach a point where  they openly mention the unrest that a depressed person gives them. 

Yes, without a doubt, their mood does not improve yours. But saying this to someone suffering from a depression makes them feel lonely and only increases their negative emotions.

The way you can help is by supporting them and doing everything you can to find the right resources to address this issue.

Depression is a serious problem

Depression is not purely psychological. Nor is there one particular way they can be cured. There does not even have to be a particular reason why it occurred.

Depressed people do not know the meaning of life. They have a hard time feeling anything, and may have a hard time finding joy in things they used to like to do.

Having a depression means fighting a daily battle for survival. Keep this in mind when talking to depressed people. People do not need to hear how wrong they are, and not at all when they are suffering from depression. Instead, they need to feel loved and understood.